Despite previous evidence to the contrary, you’ll be glad to hear that I do occasionally enjoy friendly, respectful, and just plain nice correspondence with other members of my local BDSM community. Recently I received such an email relating to events from a few months ago. This post is a summary of my experience of those events and the recent email I got which referred to them.
Actually, it was such an absolutely scrumptious email of yumminess that I just had to share it with you! It sure made a welcome change from the correspondence I usually get from the local BDSM populace.
Anyhow, on with the show.
On a summer evening earlier this year, kvetch and I had a few pervy friends over for a party. At that party, one of my friends expressed some anxiety about an upcoming family visit. Thanks to my own experiences, I recognised those feelings very well and knew how exceedingly unpleasant they could be.
Last year I was licensed and certified as an NLP practitioner. Amongst the things I learnt were some quick and easy skills which I thought might help my friend cope with family situations more calmly. So after some discussion, we gave it a go, and had a session right there lasting approximately 10 minutes. The other guests witnessed the session quietly without interfering.
Afterwards I felt that the session had gone well, but I was interested to know how effective it turned out to be in practice. So I asked my friend to let me know how the family visit went, and last week I received this update by email. With the author’s permission, I am very pleased to share that email with you now. 1 :)
Subject: [Lady Lubyanka] How To Mail Me Stuff
Date: 14 October 2009 16:38:10 IST
Dear Lady Lubyanka,
Having kindly received a psychotherapeutic treatment from you some months ago for reasons relating but not limited to my upcoming family visit, I would like to extend my deepest gratitude for your services. As you may recall, prior to our session I was tormented by years of psychological anxieties. And I mean that in earnest.
Shortly after our session, I began preparing for that lengthy visit. At this point I began to doubt the persistence of the positive effects of your work. Due to my tendency to analyse things, I thought that knowing how it worked would prevent it from working.
However, my analysis notwithstanding, and for reasons I have yet to understand, it worked. IT WORKED! At no cost, with little effort, and despite my analysis-induced doubts, the services you provided really, truly worked.
And I don’t mean to over-dramatise this. But as I told you at the time, these anxieties were long-standing and difficult to contend with. And in the event that either you or the outside observer is interested in a more thorough case history, I have provided below a list of events contributing to my psychological anxieties which led me to seek your help:
- I am born to a family whose members hold views bearing a striking resemblance to those of certain early 20th century dictators.
- From age 2 – 12 I develop and grow. I communicate freely with my immediate surroundings within the sexually repressed town of Xenophobia. However, preoccupations relating to (a) sweets, (b) crayons, and (c) cartoon rôle models prevent the lamentable familial ideologies from bearing much relative significance at this stage in life.
- Amidst smoldering adolescent angst, I take refuge in books and music promoting respect for free thought, the value of the individual and inclusion of diversity. These influences, as I’m sure you are well aware, were in direct competition with the ideologies of my family.
- I attend University, use irritating words like “paradigm”, get a job with some morally superiour vegan do-gooders, realise how much unnecessary conflict I had been living with, avoid inflammatory political banter, panic at the thought of returning home, and endure anxiety crises.
- Time passes. Adulthood blooms, and my anxieties bloom along with it.
- I incredulously avail myself of your services. Your services work.
Taking my timeline into consideration, I hope you can appreciate the nature and scope of my problem. Given the usefulness of your help, you will most probably also appreciate the very positive effects your services have had on my psyche. (Case in point: After our session, I didn’t even mind listening to my relatives spouting forth for eight hours. In fact, it was rather refreshing to learn that my relatives can be entertaining even to those who disagree with them.) You see, I have changed the way I conceptualize my family.
In my view, the unethically regulated BDSM Ireland is doing itself a disservice by barring talented individuals such as yourself from participating in its organized events. Although my problem itself was not of bdsm D/s nature, I could very easily see the expansion and application of your very useful services within the bdsm community. That, however, is another topic altogether.
With much gratitude,
1 This message has been edited to preserve the anonymity of the author. The original message was a much more entertaining read, and the author and I both would rather have published it as originally written.
Unfortunately, due to the persistent and ongoing bullying, harassing, and excluding behaviour of a few local individuals and organisations, publication of the unedited version would have put the author at unacceptable risk. However, the essence of the message remains intact, and the author has approved and consented to the publication of this version.
I would like to extend my heartfelt thanks to the author for their very kind words, and for their courage and willingness to publish them.