Vanilla Kink

Way back at the beginning of May, I enjoyed a revelry-filled weekend away with kvetch in the company of a group of friends.   Technically, these friends are  (mostly)  vanilla.   Having said that, they’re also quite kink-friendly.   They are thoroughly inclusive and supportive in ways which allow me to enjoy squeaky Irvingness and general fully-dressed pervery in perfect safety whenever the mood takes me.   :)

Anyhow, on the Friday night, just for fun, one friend had brought along a bag of long balloons, those ones that can be squozen and twisted into balloon animals.   Because my friends are imaginative and creative, the ensuing balloon art was mostly, um,  not  representations of animals.   ;)

Nearly Busting A Gut

My first attempts at creative balloonery ended up with me nearly busting a gut for about 40 minutes trying to inflate a red balloon, until somebody finally saw fit to mention to me:

    “Oh, yeah, right, actually, um, none of the red ones inflate properly, here, have some other coloured ones.”

It took maybe an hour for my face to return to its usual colour, and for the dizziness to subside.   You know, that kind of dizziness you get when you try  really hard  to inflate a pencil using  only  your nose?

Anyhow, I indulged myself in a  (rather breathless)  rant for several minutes, addressing the importance of communication and consideration for the eye-popping-lung-related health of people who are supposed to be one’s friends.

After which I felt much better.   :)

Anatomical Millinery

For some reason my creative juices were flowing  away  from the balloon animal department at that particular moment, and  towards  the balloon millinery department instead.

In other words, I made a rather smart balloony hat.   :)

I think I successfully managed to  (stylistically)  marry haute couture with a kind of anatomical millinery situation.

    (ok, yes, I admit it, I deliberately made a hat that looks like a penis)

So, after numerous beverages had been consumed, balloons variously inflated  (or not),  and assorted states of tiredness and inebriation were settling in nicely, one of my perv-friendly friends managed to capture one of my vanilla-pervily-intertwined moments on film memory card.

So here I am, wearing my extra-smart bespoke penile millinery, a handcuffy-styled chain with the keys to kvetch’s chastity device on it, and enjoying a shared intimate moment with Irving, my rubber chicken and flogger, all in a supportive, inclusive, totally vanilla environment.

My stompy leather footwear is not visible in this image.   But it’s there.   :)
Vanilla Kink


Is It A Spleen?

That same evening, this low-resolution moment was captured on the phonecam of a friend who apparently has phenomenal lung function  (despite being a smoker).  She showed off her Superhero Lungness to me by making me a red balloon model of a certain human part.   Can you guess which part it is?
Human Parts Balloon

      (hint:   it isn’t a spleen)


There’s Always One Last Thing…

I know I’m fortunate to have friends like this.

Although the weekend I described above was something entirely different to this year’s Bicon, and my friends at that weekend are entirely separate and different to Bicon-ers,  (although they’re every bit as inclusive and friendly),  I’d like to take this opportunity to echo a friend’s sentiment:

I wish more people and more environments were as inclusive and supportive as Bicon.

About Lady Lubyanka

I am a 45 year old musician, and also a multisexual, polyamourous, Jewish, socially dominant woman within my romantic BDSM relationships.
This entry was posted in BDSM, inclusion, Me Me Me Me Me, Psychology, Respect, Silly. Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Vanilla Kink

  1. Scatman Dan says:

    All very well said. Nice post.

  2. Thank you Dan, how nice to see you. :)

    Have you recovered from the pervery I mean,  purity  test yet?   :p

  3. Tom Allen says:

    Identities have been disguised to protect the innocent.


    As if there are any innocents in this neighborhood.

  4. Tom, I was referring to  Irving.   ;)

  5. Tom Allen says:

    I thought that Irving was the rubber fetishist?

    And how innocent could he possibly be? Didn’t you ever hear the adage “Erotic is using a feather. Kinky is using the whole chicken”?

  6. Heh, in my book, “kinky” can coexist with “innocence”, no problem.   :)

    And whilst using the whole chicken may indeed be kinkier than using a single feather, Irving might not count as a whole chicken (he’s full of air inside for squeezing purposes).   And he’s a rubber chicken, so he doesn’t have feathers anyhow.   And if Irving were a rubber fetishist, then by definition he’d also be a canniballist.

    I would also dispute the idea that using a pervertible for kink makes it any more perverse or kinky in and of itself than it was before.

    In short, I won’t have anybody impugning Irving, so there!  (even if they aren’t actually impugning him)

    I admit that I’ve spent time on this which I might more profitably have invested in thwacking consenting people with stuff.   Oh well.   :)

  7. Tom Allen says:

    Heh, in my book, “kinky” can coexist with “innocence”, no problem.

    Oh sure – take me, for example.

    I admit that I’ve spent time on this which I might more profitably have invested in thwacking consenting people with stuff.

    There’s a lesson in here someplace…

  8. Pingback: Vanilla Kink - Update « Lady Lubyanka

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