Comments on: Welcome to the hit series – Attack, Marginalise, and Exclude!

By: Correspondence I Like « Lady Lubyanka

Correspondence I Like « Lady Lubyanka — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 07:10:29 +0000

[...] and ongoing bullying, harassing, and excluding behaviour of a few local individuals and organisations, publication of the unedited version would have put the author at unacceptable risk. [...]

By: Moderator Mails – Part The Second « Lady Lubyanka

Moderator Mails – Part The Second « Lady Lubyanka — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 23:04:20 +0000

[...] From: Fig Subject: nimhneach Date: 19 April 2009 10:01:58 IST To: Lubyanka [...]

By: Group Rules – Updated June 2009 « Lady Lubyanka

Group Rules – Updated June 2009 « Lady Lubyanka — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 01:52:05 +0000

[...] This rule contains perfectly accurate descriptions of the behaviour perpetrated against me by bdsmireland moderators and group members. The bdsmireland moderators even link to to some of the very same pages I [...]

By: Group Rule Update – Commentary « Lady Lubyanka

Group Rule Update – Commentary « Lady Lubyanka — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 01:20:19 +0000

[...] 3 July, 2009 · Leave a Comment Since I have been banned from bdsmireland and Nimhneach, and since this is unlikely to change in my lifetime, normally I’d expect to just leave it [...]

By: The Galway Munch « Lady Lubyanka

The Galway Munch « Lady Lubyanka — Tue, 30 Jun 2009 21:23:12 +0000

[...] that similarly to other messages I have had from individuals and moderators in bdsmireland and Nimhneach, TC makes no mention of any specific allegations, transgressions, dates, group posts, [...]

By: Steve Mayhew

Steve Mayhew — Wed, 06 May 2009 00:29:06 +0000

I suspect the mental and emotional effort required to leave a powerful clique has many parallels with what is required to leave a cult. Neither sort of heirachy like to let people leave. It’s bad for their credibility.

In my experience of cliques, the worst position to be in is central AND marginalised.

Those who are truly on the true outskirts can come and go as they please without anyone minding too much. That’s no threat. But those who are considred central to the social group will get a lot of pressure and aggression when they start to move or to question the heirarchy. They’re not supposed to leave. They’re supposed to toe the line, to validate the power of those trying to put themselves at the top.

That’s happened to me when I was younger, in the music scene. I got a lot of shit for doing things my own way. Sounds like what’s happening here. The worst thing is, it’s so fucking tiring emotionally. You have to do a whole lot of work on yourself, for no real reward, other than just being normal again.

By: Lady Lubyanka

Lady Lubyanka — Tue, 21 Apr 2009 21:03:43 +0000

You sure know how to sushi a person, kvetch. :) That was yummy! *drool*

By: Leandrai

Leandrai — Sun, 19 Apr 2009 19:07:54 +0000

I want to add these links… try it yourself, in relation to all you have seen… it certainly ticks all the boxes for me:
http://www.cultclinic.org/words.html
http://www.cultclinic.org/qa7.html

I just wish I knew an answer to it all, not just for you, but for the good people still sucked into it (though it’s very hard for me to think of anyone as “good” while they support you being treated this way).

By: Leandrai

Leandrai — Sun, 19 Apr 2009 18:01:31 +0000

Today is the first anniversary of the day that I walked away from BDSMIreland.

When I walked away people were offering to do almost anything if I would only stay.

Today I just feel relieved that I ignored them and went through with it…because otherwise I have no idea how I would live with the shame being connected to a group of people who are prepared to treat an human being as badly as you have been treated, all the while trying to rub your nose in how “tolerant” and “caring” they are, and how wonderful it is to be part of their community.

But the truth, Lubyanka, is that they are just twisted little playground bullies who’s heads never grew up, and, whatever it may once have been, over the past three years or so, their “wonderful community” has evolved into nothing more than a sick little cult…and I do mean that literally, I have been doing some research on the topic.

http://www.counseling.caltech.edu/articles/cults.html

On a different level, because you are my friend and I care about you, I am just glad that you won’t be sucked in any more.

By: Kvetch

Kvetch — Sun, 19 Apr 2009 17:39:23 +0000

I don’t know about you, but I’m on the edge of my seat here, waiting for the next instalment. Will our plucky heroine prevail in the end against the forces of douchebaggery?

But, before all that, time for some Yamamori sushi SWMBO!